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Thread: Arizona???

  1. #1
    FOBL Owner/GM frozenrope's Avatar
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    Dec 2002
    Aurora, Illinois

    Default Arizona???

    (Scottsdale) - Kel Bunch crushes another batting practice pitch over the right field wall at Stadium 54, and starts to taunt pitching coach William Tieman.

    "Hey coach, did you used to throw that junk when you were playin? How did you win 200 games?", he says with a laugh. Tieman only smiles.

    "251 son. And 44 shutouts. That's almost as many as you on a Saturday night." The Discotheque players surrounding Bunch start cracking up. Another pitch. Crack! Another pitch over the wall. Disco Balls go off in the bleachers. "Saturday Night Fever!", Bunch shouts.

    Life has been good in Scottsdale since the arrival of the 1st round slugger, acquired in a trade earlier in the year from Portland. He's been just the remedy the Discotheques needed to climb back into the playoff race, a race the Arizona faithful have been missing the last 6 seasons. 14 seasons, really. Since their 111 wins in 2031, Arizona has made the playoffs just once, a quick 1st round sweep exit in 2038 at the hands of the Montana Monarchs. The last time they've won a playoff series, Todd Coulter was a rookie, Leslie Pino was still playing, and Los Alamos still existed. There have been a couple of attempts at a rebuild, but never more than 88 wins, never a team that could compete with the Pocket Otters, Mets, or Monarchs of their division. So GM/Hot Dog Vendor Chris Williams decided to take a different approach.

    "Power," he exclaimed in a recent interview. "This team had always been built around pitching, with good average and a couple of power hitters. This time, we've spent the last several seasons focusing almost exclusively on power. And not just good all-around power, but those that can consistently hit 30-40 home runs every season, even in a ballpark as cavernous as Stadium 54. I want opposing pitchers to get to the 8th hitter in our lineup and think, "Shit, he can hit the ball 500 feet as well."

    The power surge in the majors is slow to arrive. Last season the team hit just 101 homers, an all-time low. Picking up 1st baseman Brad Sullivan in a trade with Milwaukee was a 1st step, albeit a small one. (8 HR's in limited action last year, 15 this year) This season, the arrival of #1 overall pick Doug Davis was the 2nd step. And to this point he hasn't disappointed, smacking 18 home runs his rookie season through August 15th. Even more impressive has been Bunch, who was advertised in the trade block as 'Primed and ready to go'. In just 24 games and 102 at-bats, Bunch is hitting .382 with 12 homers, a 1.241 OPS and 2 Player of the Week Awards. Primed? Grade A Angus Beef Primed. Arizona has gone over the .500 mark in the last week for the first time all season, and is now sitting in 3rd place and is a good bet to secure a playoff spot. But Williams is not finished.

    "We've got some good guys brewing in the minors, and hopefully they can make a contribution in the next 2 seasons," he said with a wide smile like a kid who's hoping for the $400 Lego Death Star under his tree for Christmas. The prospect list has a stable of bats that this franchise has never seen before. 2nd baseman Mitch Robinson will be the next one to get the call (8/11/7/7/9); a doubles hitter with surprising pop. Right behind him will be left-fielder Cisco Ramirez (6/9/10/6/4), a boom-or-bust Rob Deer type but with a rocket OF arm. Crown jewel #1 will be Right Fielder Manny Morin (9/7/11/8/9), who's about a year out. Crown jewel #2 will be Catcher Lonnie McKinley (8/8/10/7/6), Arizona's 1st rounder in this season's draft. He's tearing up rookie ball (although to be honest, who doesn't?), and should see Major League action by 2045. Also sitting in rookie ball is 1st baseman Shaun MacNaughton (8/7/8/4/7), who will most likely replace Brad Sullivan when he is ready to do so.

    "That's 7 guys in the lineup above average in power, with 5 that can hit 40," says Ruben Plum, Team Manager/Bubble Gum dispenser. If we can get them to fill even 75% of their potential, this could be Arizona's most powerful lineup ever. And all still on rookie contracts."

    Arizona has never been known as a power team. Galen Auld is the franchises' all-time home run leader, with only 220. "We've brought in a power hitter from time to time," says Plum. "But the home grown ones are few and far between. And the ones we have groomed seem to be traded before they make their mark over here. Ruben Sanchez, Ronald Oliveros... those are some fish we'd like to have back." Currently, the Discotheques rank 2nd in FOBL in the Top Prospect list, and that's not including Davis, who fell off the list later in the year when he notched too many at-bats.

    Only time will tell if the recent acquisitions and draft picks of the 'Theques will have a major impact in FOBL. The dev machine can be very fickle that way. And the quest for Murderer's Row has come at the expense of pitching, which might lead to 9-6 losses instead of the old 4-2 ones. But for the first time in a long, long time..actually the first time ever, Arizona faithful might finally get to see it rain homers in the desert. In Bunches.


    'Tragedy is when I stub my toe. Comedy is when you fall down a manhole and die." - Mel Brooks

    "Prophet Harold Camping who predicted the end of the world has died. That's kinda sad but its not the end of the world" -
    Eric Idle

  2. #2
    FOBL Board of Governors Hollywood's Avatar
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  3. #3
    Owner and GM, Washington Piledrivers and Virginia Woodchucks Subby's Avatar
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    Dec 2002
    Chocolate City


    Love when Rope is pumped about FOBL.
    Virginia Woodchucks 2001-2035, 2039-present
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    Gindin League Champions (4) 2004, 2010, 2032, 2060
    Wilderness/Skates Division Champs (9) 2001, 2004, 2008, 2010, 2011, 2045, 2048, 2058, 2060

  4. #4
    FOBL Board of Governors Morgado's Avatar
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    Dec 2002
    Fairfax, VA


    i'm agree with subby

    Davenport Falcons - 2043 FOBL Solecismic Series Winners

    (05 OCT 2011) 09:56:52 am [kurtism]: morg is the honey badger of economic analysts
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